Horror-FAIL Friday: How NOT to Write Horror Part I

There are those of you out there that have toiled with the idea of writing a horror story. It may have been just a quick campfire tale, a one-shot Creepypasta, a full-length novel, or even the background for a survival horror game. There are the cliche ways to go about doing this. Five teenagers meet at their house in the woods, one by one are separated, and end up dying horrible violent deaths (Only Joss Whedon has managed to re-invent this genre and do it like a boss, in my opinion). Then, there are the truly fun and unique ways to go about writing horror. This is what I enjoy. However, there’s always that daunting task of how to go about starting a project like this. Sometimes taking that first step can be the most intimidating thing you do. For the lazy, I was horrified to discover a wiki page on how to write a horror story. A WIKI. Are you freaking kidding me?

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Buckwheat Pancakes… meh…

COOKING ADVENTURES #3: BUCKWHEAT PANCAKES

Good evening, readers.

Yes. You’ve assumed correctly. I managed to screw up buckwheat pancakes. I’m in no way proud of this. In fact, I’m beginning to get fed up. The recipe was practically idiot proof. And to my knowledge, I followed the instructions exactly. I’m not sure how it turned out so wrong.

Cheesecake… Next time, It’s Coming From a Box!

Food Adventures #2: Cheesecake

Dear God. I’ve just spent the last four hours in the kitchen trying to cook not only my very first cheesecake but also my dinner. As you can probably guess, I had some trouble… again.

Allot of this I’m blaming on the fact that its Friday the 13th. That and I was cooking with a headache. But really now, let’s go back to the beginning, shall we?

How NOT to Cook Pastitsio…

COOKING ADVENTURES #1: Pastitsio

 

Good Morning, readers.

So last night while attempting to make the Greek dish, Pastitsio, for the first time, I learned a few things:

1.) There are directions for a reason.

2.) Print out the directions so that you can keep them with you in the kitchen.

3.) Preparing ahead of time is a good thing.

4.) When you do read the directions, read them carefully.

5.) If you are an hour into the project and getting tired, don’t make the rest of it up as you go.

6.) DO NOT GET SIDETRACKED!

And that was how I failed to make Pastitsio correctly last night.

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[WARNING: This is absolutely terrible. I don’t cook like this all the time… I swear!]